One:Janesville Janissaries

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The Problem[edit]

Tell me, dear reader, after your long days of sweat and pain, when you finally close your eyes to black out the raging light of a dying civilization, whose face do you see? When the world is finally emptied of its people and nothing is left but blackened earth and scorched sky and when you look into the swirling ash at your feet, whose face do you see? When whatever pathetic god you once prayed to has abandoned you, when his grace has turned putrid, when his holy light has gone dark and the thought of your faith in him turns your blood sour, whose face will you turn to? When you search for hope and learn it missing, when you yearn for truth and find none, when you ache for relief and only receive suffering in turn, to whom will you turn? What dark medicine would you take to soothe the ache that buttresses your wretched being? What cruel figure could slake the thirst that is your meaningless existence?

The Solution[edit]

If the answer to any of those questions was Fyvush Finkel, well, good news: you might be a Janesville Jannisary! Praise Finkel! Come join us at our base camp in Janesville Wisconsin, just off of I90, and be sure to bring the whole family. We’re a fun-loving faith community that welcomes all people to stop by, hang out, grab a S’more (yum!) and strengthen your faith in the Holy Finkel. If you’re “itch”ing to join a sado-eldritch horror cult, then we’re the sado-eldritch horror cult for you!


Janesville Attractions[edit]

Janesville is a charming village that still retains a lot of its Old World charms. See the Exotic Metals mine that almost caused the unmaking of the world. Don’t forget to have an existential crisis by visiting the Soul of the Void – they validate parking!


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