One:Quid Pro Quo Technology

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Quid Pro Quo Technology is the provision imposed by the negotiations surrounding the Cohabitive Soft Peace, by which humanity was required to maintain a technological status quo. While the details are complex and largely expressed in binary code, the essence of the edict is that, for every new technology discovered or invented by humans, a technology (or combination of technologies) of comparable complexity must be abandoned.

The degree to which a given group of technologies are considered comparable is based on an algorithm implemented on, and maintained as a closely-held secret by, the computational cluster known as Big Azure. Output from this algorithm has been observed to vary over time and in direct or inverse relationship with several external climatalogical, geographic, astrological, and epidemiological factors, leading some researchers to suspect that Big Azure's algorithm is not entirely deterministic. [1]

However unpredictable or unfair the decisions leaving the output ports of Big Azure may be, it is undeniable that the decisions are ruthlessly enforced by murder spiders worldwide. Notable technology tradeoffs have included the following:

  • In exchange for HD Holographic Dancing, humans were required to abandon voice telephony and cholesterol-reducing egg substitutes.
  • In exchange for the Baudolino Process, humans were required to abandon high heels, the electric toothbrush, and all artificial food colorings in the general range of "blue" to "bluish-green".
  • In exchange for the Tag, humans were required to abandon use of the wheel other than when underground.


References[edit]

  1. See, for example, Sanger, Oculus, and M-27v2.3003 software revision 13b, "Why We Think Big Azure is Just Dicking Us Around", Journal of Pugnacious Epistemology 11.05 (213 AK).

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